The Great Adventure
by Nakiju
Summary: "I died." "Ah, on the whole, I think not." We looked at each other in silence. "Do I have to go back then?" "That is up to you." "I've got a choice?" "Oh yes. You could board a train instead." "And where would it take me?" "On." Heather Potter takes a reincarnation express! It's like an OC-SI, but without the O and the S. Cross-posted from Ao3
1. Prologue

I stood in the King's Cross station, faced with a dead man. There was bright mist swirling in the air, and I certainly have never seen the floor so clean here before. It was eerie.

"I died."

"Ah, on the whole, I think not." Said Dumbledore magnanimously.

"Not?"

"Not." The old man repeated himself.

"But… I let him kill me. I went to him, and watched him curse me. I didn't even try to defend myself."

"And that," said Dumbledore, "will, I think, have made all the difference."

We looked at each other in silence.

"Do I have to go back then?" I felt dread rising up in my chest.

"That is up to you."

"I've got a choice?"

"Oh yes." Dumbledore smiled at me, but there was no twinkle in his eye. "I think that if you decided not to go back, you would be able to … let's say … board a train."

"And where would it take me?"

"On," said Dumbledore simply. I looked at him dubiously.

"Voldemort's got the Elder Wand."

"True. Voldemort has the Elder Wand."

"You told me once that death was but the next great adventure."

"True again. I have told you that."

I thought about it. I looked into the face of the man who could have been like a father to me but who have not loved me enough. I understood his reasons; apparently in death I did no longer feel the need to smash something when faced with my inability to get a straight answer out of him. Giving up my life for the greater good has put some things into perspective.

I thought about the people I have left behind. Hermione. Ron. Ginny. I loved them dearly. We shared joy and tears through our time at Hogwarts. We discovered magic together, and I could not imagine my life without them in it.

I thought about what would happen if I decided to go back. About the fighting that was still to be done. About the rebuilding that would be needed after. Would I become an Auror? I would never be able to give Ginny what she deserves. I couldn't marry her, I couldn't make her happy. If I wanted to truly change things, I would need to be a politician for real, never step out of the public eye.

Finally, I looked at the ugly deformed foetus wailing under one of the eerie white benches.

There was only one Horcrux left on Earth, and I was not the only Gryffindor.

I stepped onto the train.

…

We sped up and the Platform Nine and Three Quarters was gone in a white smudge. Instead of the usual views I would expect on this train, there was quickly approaching all encompassing darkness. It felt like it bled into my train compartment from outside, taking away not only my sight but all sense perception. I don't know how long I spent in the perfect void.

And then, all of a sudden, in a blink of an eye, there was a light at the end of the tunnel, but I was not in a train anymore, and God, why did everything burn like that?! What was going on?! I must have lost my glasses in the whole getting dead fiasco, because all I could see were unrecognisable patches of light and dark, mostly light, that was way too bright and hurting my eyes. And for the love of Merlin, could someone get this child to stop screaming like this?!

I took a breath to say as much and the screaming stopped.

Wait. Rewind. I've been screaming. Yes, well, it hurt all over, and I swear someone must've hit me.

But I could swear I heard a child cry. I spent enough time around Teddy when he was born to be able to pinpoint that particular pitch of a seriously unhappy baby.

Was… I the baby?

Huh.

I supposed that getting born again would indeed count as a great adventure.

I took a train here. I've been on a train and now I'm a baby. I took a reincarnation train. Well, going by how I was just talking to Dumbledore not that long ago, I took a reincarnation express. Merlin, I hoped my new Mum was alright.

I had parents now. What a thought. Well, at least I definitely had a Mum. Who I think must have gotten hold of me, because I was suddenly feeling warm and safe and sleepy.

…


	2. Identity

Being a baby could be frustrating sometimes. My new Mum didn't speak English, so I got to learn a new language, which was cool, because Heather Potter never spoke another language, but also pretty annoying, because I had no idea what was going on around me. My eyesight was either as bad as Heather's had been, or maybe it was a baby thing, but I could hardly make out anything about my surroundings. And I couldn't get this brand new body to listen to me nearly as well as I could when I had been Heather.

But on the other hand, things were much better than when I had been seventeen. I couldn't remember when was the last time Heather had been able to let her guard down like I could. I napped a lot. I was always warm and fed and my Mum often held me. She sang to me, and she had a beautiful voice. No one had ever sung to Heather, and for the last year of her life she was never safe, and sometimes went hungry. The least I could do for my Mum was to be an easy baby.

My Mum had beautiful red hair. It was the first thing about her I learned to recognise, apart from her voice.

I also had a father now. His hair was red, too, but much shorter than Mum's, and he had a beard that tickled when he blew raspberries on my tummy. His eyes were a deep purple shade that Heather has never seen on a human, and they were always warm when he got close enough for me to see them clearly. It was obvious they loved me. I couldn't help but love them back.

…

Time passed in an entirely different manner when instead of measuring time by the cycle of days and nights, I measured it by my meals. I slept a lot in the sling that my Mum, and sometimes my Dad wore. They carried me around everywhere they needed to go, and as my eyesight improved, apparently it was a baby thing after all, I got to see the world from my parents' warm embrace.

We lived by the seaside. Mum took me to the beach sometimes. She would lie out a large fluffy blanket, and I would lie on it or squirm around it, while she did her thing. 'Her thing' involved notebooks and scrolls and brushes. She would paint patterns that looked nothing like what Heather had been used to. I tried watching her at her task sometimes, but the sunlight was warm and the breeze from the sea pleasant, and often the next thing I knew we were back at the house and I was being fed.

I also learnt to recognise the scent that was in the air whenever I was outdoors; it was salt. Heather had only ever been to the seaside once, during her last year, on the run. It had been nothing like what I got to experience. Heather had been scared and hunted down, and as she had set up the wards around her camp side, the furthest thing from her mind was enjoying the views or having a nice walk on the beach. And it had been winter then besides; it was cold and miserable regardless.

The beach Mum took me to had golden sand and calm waters, and as I grew older and gained more control over my body, sometimes she let me waddle in the wet sand, with waves that tickled me as they washed past me. The water was always warm. On one memorable occasion, Mum stripped down to her undergarments and took me into the shallow water, keeping me secure all the time. There were little colourful fish and long algae and I giggled as I tried to catch them with my little clumsy fingers. Then Mum must've used wandless magic, because she held out her hand out of the water, and above her palm was a bubble of water, just floating there, with a pretty little red fish swimming around! Mum was a witch! I giggled with glee and clapped my hands, and she released the fish back into the water.

"When you are older, I will teach you just how to do that Himari, my sweet sunflower." I have been diligently listening to all conversations when I could keep myself awake, and I was beginning to understand what was said around me. Apparently I got the best deal out of my reincarnation express, because it seemed like I gained typical baby language learning skills, and also retained Heather's adult understanding of abstract concepts, like the relative passage of time, and notably, awareness of the self. Also, my name was Himari. Being born to a pair of jokesters was apparently to be my lot in this life as well, seeing as my Mum was called Hikari, or light. Her parents were probably dignified people, but she decided to take it and make it into a nurture pun.

I haven't met my grandparents, or at least I didn't think I did. Was it because they were no longer alive, or lived away, or didn't want to have anything to do with people who named their child for a joke, I didn't know. I also didn't have any siblings. I wasn't upset about that; I could always get younger siblings still! It was a small part of why I made a point not to fuss without a good reason. A much larger part was that I felt loved the way Heather never had, and I basked in the warmth of it. (Ha!) I was a genuinely happy baby.

...

Before Mum demonstrated that she was a witch, I hardly gave any thought to magic since being born again. Heather had been a witch. I… wasn't Heather. Yes, I remembered what it was like to be Heather. But Heather had died, she had given up her life for the good of the wizarding world. And then she was given a chance to undo that sacrifice, and keep on fighting, but she had decided to stay dead instead. She was tired of fighting, and of running, and of people relying on her even though she had felt so deeply inadequate for the tasks put before her. I remembered how Heather had felt when she was made to try and win the war that wizards older and wiser and more powerful than her had started and failed to end. And when she inevitably failed as well, she was called out for failing the public's overblown expectations.

Heather had found little happiness. She had her friends, Ron and Hermione, who were like a brother and a sister to her, but who had let her down again and again. She had let them down too, over and over, until she let them down once and for all, when she went to her death and did not come back. And then there had been Ginny. Heather was the happiest she had ever been when she turned sixteen and discovered how it was to love and be loved in turn by Ginny. But it was short lived. Then she was hunted again, and she left Ginny behind, even though it broke both of their hearts. And anyway, the wizarding world did not permit girls to marry each other, even if it was the Girl-Who-Lived in question. Or maybe particularly then. Heather didn't care to stick around to find out which. She had no family left, only friends scarred by the war as much as she was, and a love that could never be. Heather had not been happy. But I was.

My name was Himari Uzumaki, and even though I remembered being Heather Potter, I was not her.

Heather's life was over, by her own decision; twice over. She had burned bright, and she had burnt out early, and I would remember her, but I would not be her. She had been a true hero, always trying to save someone, and sacrificing herself to make a world a better place. She deserved to be remembered. I was just a baby, barely a year old, and I did not deserve to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. Maybe I remembered Heather Potter exactly so that I could know this: heros die. I wasn't planning on being a hero. I was one year old, I recently begun to articulate, I loved my Mum and Dad, and my world was limited to the island village of Uzushio, where I was born.

A/N: I should probably warn you at this point that I haven't seen an actual Naruto episode in years, so my knowledge of later canon and backstories draws on fandom and the wiki pages. As such, I might contradict canon things in this story, on purpose or not. When I inevitably do, just roll with it! I'm just having a bit of fun with this :) Let me know what you think!


	3. Possession

I discovered that the word for magic is chakra. All living things need it, and Mum recently begun to show me how to look for it. Ever since I had enough coordination to hold a brush, Mum has been showing me how to paint seals. Some time after that I begun to read. It's quite funny, that I learnt to write before I learnt to read, but writing is the key to witchcraft. Mum and Dad use seals, just the way Heather used to use her wand. Seals can store things, and create barriers, and change properties of a thing, like making soft things hard, and hard things soft. They can regulate temperature, and create whirlpools in the water, and make light appear, and a thousand other things, and the seal that is the village keeps hostile people away. I knew that because Dad has been teaching me about seals, even though Mum would tell him I was too little to understand all the things he told me. I probably would have been, if I didn't remember being Heather.

So I told Mum and Dad that I understood the abstract concepts Dad brought up, because I remembered how being seventeen feels like. They brought me to the building in the very centre of the village, one that I have never been to before. It was tall and very imposing. There were guards at both sides of the large wooden gate, dressed in full armor, and with wicked long swords and large scrolls tied to their backs. They commanded respect; I understood enough about seals to be able to think of a dozen ways off the top of my head in which a scroll like that could be dangerous. When they saw my parents and me, all dressed in formal kimonos, they opened the gates without a word.

We entered a large hall, with an incredibly tall ceiling, held up by tall blue columns with beautiful seals carved into them meticulously. An attendant came up to my father, who spoke to her in hushed tones, and the gate closed behind us. We were lead to an ornamental garden that must rest in the very centre of the village, and there, by the pond with a whirlpool in it, sat a dignified man. He was an Uzumaki too, going by his fiery red hair and pale lavender eyes. He was wearing a blue, embroidered kimono, and… yes, the patterns on his clothes were seals too.

"What bring you here today, Asahi-san, Hikari-san? Is it finally the day that I get to meet your charming daughter?" He seemed friendly enough, even though I was pretty sure it was an unplanned visit. There were many Uzumaki in town, so it was little surprise that I never seen him before. I still didn't have any siblings, but the abundance of red haired children my age was good enough for me. I hardly knew how any of them were related to me, exactly, but we were all Uzumaki, and that was enough for me as far as as playmates went. I had a dozen cousins my age, and having a big family was exactly as much as fun as Heather had thought it would be. Ever since I had enough coordination to run somewhat reliably, a lot of my time was spent chasing around the streets and gardens around where I lived, with the pack of other Uzumaki children. We played ninja a lot, but what the game actually signified changed every other day.

Mum and Dad had to have explained what they brought me here for, because I was lead to yet another room, and my parents, and the man in the blue kimono, and another couple of red haired people got to painting a seal. I recognised Auntie Keiko and waved enthusiastically at her. She was the mother of Maiko, one of my many cousins, who was a bit older than me, and was currently missing her front teeth. Another thing that made Maiko special was that she only lived two doors down from me, so she was the first person I found when I was looking for company other than Mum and Dad. And also Auntie Keiko made amazing melon buns. She waved back at me.

The seal took up all of the floor and ceiling, and the majority of the walls too. It was done fairly quickly. After the blue kimono man checked it over, misdrawn seals were not fun, it was deemed complete.

"Himari-chan, come and step in the middle for us." Said the blue kimono man. I was starting to suspect that he was something like a head Uzumaki. Uzumaki were a ninja clan, which was something like the noble and ancient house of Black that Heather's godfather belonged to, just less black magic and more seals and gymnastics. All the red hair going around was probably a pointer that intermarriage was something that both families approved of, though.

I stepped in the middle of the seal. I wondered what was supposed to happen. This was the kind of thing that Heather would have been really freaked out about, had she been alive, but I knew that my Mum and Dad would never let anything bad happen to me. And it was not like I was not familiar with seals. This one didn't seem to be working though. I felt it activate when I stepped in place, a faint rippling of chakra that I could almost see in the ink lines, but besides that, the seal wasn't doing anything.

"There is no signs of possession, Asashi-san, Hikari-san. If Himari-chan says she remembers being someone else, either she is very creative, or she really does have an old soul. But it's definitely her own, there is no one else there with her." Well, I could have told them as much. Heather had left the disgusting Voldemort foetus behind when she boarded the train. But I supposed it was nice to have a confirmation that I was not like her in the soul-passengers department.

...

"What do you remember, Himari-chan?" We moved back to the ornamental garden with the whirlpool, and this time there were snacks!

"I used to be called Heather." It was funny how out of place the name seemed spoken out loud. Maybe it had something to do with me stuffing my face with mochi, though. "She died when she was seventeen."

"Oh, sweetheart." Mum gathers me in her lap and hugs me throughly, not even reprimanding me for speaking with my mouth full.

"It's ok, Mummy, she chose to die, to protect her friends." At this, Dad frowned.

"She had green eyes, just like you and me!" My mother's eyes were a brilliant viridian, a shade off from the Avada Kedavra hue that Heather once had.

"Was Heather-san a ninja?" The head Uzumaki asked. He looked like he was thinking very deeply. He did a surprisingly good job with pronouncing the name though.

"No, Heather was a witch! Where she came from, there were no seals and no jutsu, but instead there was magic! There were many bad wizards though…" I trailed off. Heather's life and death are not really things I liked to dwell on. I wanted to make my own life.

After that, the atmosphere relaxed somewhat, and my parents and Hideto-sama (Dad said his name!) chatted about the seal that used to check for possession before. I ate all the sweets.


	4. School

"Himari-chan, keep up!" Cousin Maiko yelled at me. She was seven, and she was walking me to school. At least that's what she told my parents she'd do; she was actually running as fast as she could.

I had only started at the Uzushio ninja academy a few weeks ago. And the stretches that Mum has had me do since I was big enough for them didn't help with running!

School was really nice though. I enjoyed reading and learning more than Heather's ever done. But then again, there is only so long you can hang out with your parents and cousins before you get bored of it. I was glad to go to school. There were some children who weren't Uzumaki there, and wow, my family was huge for that to be a surprising statement.

I made friends with a boy called Akito, who was waving at me from the front gates.

"I'll see you after class!" Maiko yelled. I was too out of breath to yell.

"Hi, Himari-chan!" Akito had blue hair and was wearing a plain t-shirt. I waved at him, too busy trying to catch my breath to respond with words.

In class we sat together in the middle row. The first period was calligraphy. Most Uzumaki were already well versed in that, but Akito and other clanless kids struggled. Kayumi-sensei demanded silence during calligraphy practice, so I nudged Akito under the table. When I caught his eye I slid my scroll towards him and exaggerated my brush strokes. He gave me a small smile and tried to copy me, but since he was trying to look at my work and also write, he ended up putting his elbow in his pot. Water splashed on his practice scroll. A wave of silence enveloped the classroom. Kayumi-sensei looked up from his desk. The first snicker came from behind me. Poor Akito. Kayumi-sensei put his head in his palms, before grabbing an extra scroll and getting up. The whole class was having a laugh by this point.

"Here, kid. I trust you won't do that again." Akito just nodded, looking down.

Next period, it was time for physical conditioning. The less said about that, the better. If there was one thing that I envied Heather, it was a flying broom. I resolved myself to figure out a way to fly when I became an actual ninja; with all the things seals can do, flying shouldn't be impossible to achieve.

After lunch there was history, a class which I surprisingly enjoyed. Hokama-sensei told us the story of Mito-sama. She was the youngest daughter of the ninth Uzumaki clan head, but her claim to fame was larger than that of her father or any of her siblings. To prove that she was the most accomplished seal master, she tracked down the Nine Tailed Fox, and sealed it into herself. The Nine Tailed Fox was the largest sentient body of chakra known, and no one has ever before sealed any of the Tailed Beasts, let alone the largest one.

Mito-sama then went on to marry the First Hokage and live out her days in Konohagakure, the closest military ally of Uzushio. I thought it was pretty sad, that she spent most of her life away from the sea and the whirlpools.

My earliest memories as Himari Uzumaki include the sea, and I have come to love the whirlpools with all my heart. There was just something about looking out into a sea, watching calm waters break into a whirlpool large enough to affect weather, and knowing it happened because a seal was triggered, that always took my breath away. The force of nature was just so overwhelming compared to anything man made, and the knowledge that a cleverly situated seal could affect them… I really wanted to learn that.

There was a brigade in the Uzushio ninja forces that's responsible for the upkeep of the village security measures; read: whirlpools. That's what I wanted to do when I grew up. Dad was part of it. Not only did he have to know his seals well, but he had to know where it's best to place them, and when, and a lot of other things. Not to mention, he (and his team) do all of that underwater! It was just so cool. I could hold my breath for nearly two minutes, but that was not nearly long enough for underwater seal maintenance!

…

After school, Akito and I caught up with Maiko and a few other Uzumaki kids who lived in our district. Akito didn't have any siblings or cousins, and there was no one waiting for him after classes, so we took him with us.

"Race you to the market!"

We run. It was a sunny day, which was usual. The streets were winding, turning at seemingly random, creating lots of lovely nooks and crannies. We played hide and seek and catch.

We got underfoot at the market. There were plenty of street vendors, selling a variety of strong smelling wares. Merchants were loudly letting everyone know what they were selling; other people were haggling, others yet would stop and gossip.

I was looking over my shoulder, and I spotted someone jumping over rooftops. People did that when they wanted to avoid stopping for gossip in the street. Parkour was wildly popular. So I wasn't looking when I run into an adult Uzumaki, who was buying rice.

"Sorry Oba-san!" I picked up her basket, since I was on the ground anyway.

"Watch where you're going, Imouto!" she said, helping me up.

I saw Maiko sticking her tongue at me, and then I was on my way again.

...

Dad was teaching me a chakra control exercise. We were at the beach, and I was trying to lift bubbles of water up with my chakra. He said it was the first step to learning how to breathe underwater. I tried to catch fish like Mum had once done for me, but it was harder than expected! I could only lift up really small bubbles so far, but Dad said I was doing great.

…

"Hi, Auntie Keiko! Is Maiko-chan here?" Maiko promised me she would do target practice with me, but she wasn't there after classes.

"She just left a minute ago. She forgot her melon buns, can you take them for her?" She handed me a small storage scroll. I learnt how to make these recently. I was now working on smoke and light tags. Dad said I couldn't try to make explosive tags until I was older. After that, I would learn how to make barrier seals.

"Ok! Bye, Auntie Keiko!" I run before she could ruffle my hair. Mum had put green ribbons in them today, and I really liked how they looked with my red hair, and I didn't want to lose them to ruffling.

…

"Hey, hey, Akito-kun!" I plopped down on my seat. "Did you prepare for the test?!" The advancement test we had to pass before moving on to the second grade.

He groaned from where he was draped over the desk.

"You need to pass the test! I'm gonna pass, and I wanna still be in the same class!" He lifted his head and narrowed his eyes at me.

He passed it in the end, but not quite as easily as I did.


	5. Quake

I first knew something was wrong when the ground started shaking. I was practicing my chakra control by the seaside, trying to draw oxygen in the water to form water bubbles. Dad grabbed me immediately and run home at ninja speed, all while the ground shook more and more. He only put me down in the living room.

"Listen to me very carefully Himari-chan. I need you to listen and do exactly as I say, alright?" He looked me in the eye until I nodded. I've never seen him like this before. He has always been Dad, whose purple eyes were warm, and who taught me chakra control by the sea. In that moment something changed about him, like someone has flipped a switch, and for the first time I _understood_ my father was a shinobi. "The village is under attack. The shaking means that the seal that is the village is going to give out."

I felt my eyes widen. I had been training to be a shinobi for more than a year by then, handling sharp objects and sparring with other kids, but this was the very first time in this life that I felt like I might not be safe. What I remembered of being Heather came to mind.

Mum had been hustling in the background, doing something to our sealing cabinet. She came up to me, and when I looked over, the cabinet was empty.

"Sweetheart, my little sunflower. This is very important. I want you to take this," she fastened a seashell on a string around my neck, "and take good care of it, alright?" She rested her hand against the seashell, pressing it into my breastbone.

"I need you to go down to the docks, and to take a ship that's going out. The smaller the better, alright?" Dad said and I suddenly remembered all too well how it had been to be Heather and to find out that Snape was now headmaster and the only home I had was beyond my reach. My heart was thudding in my ears. I had always been safe before!

"If all goes well, we will come and find you, sweetheart." Mum promised me as she put my hair up with less care than ever before and hid it with a scarf. Then she gave me a jacket I recognised as her mission gear and all I could think of was that this was the last time I was going to see her alive. I threw myself on her and hugged her as hard as I could.

"Here, take this, and don't stop until you are outside the seal, got it?" Dad pressed a storage scroll into my hands while Mum gently untangled me from around her waist. I hugged Dad then.

"We love you very much. Be careful."

"I love you too! You are wonderful parents!" I was crying, tears falling freely down my face.

"You need to go now, love."

And just like that I left the house I grew up in. I didn't know how long the village seal would hold up, but the earthquake had only gotten worse. I headed to the docks trying my best not to be seen, or stopped.

There was panic on the streets, ninja blinking past this way and that, and civilians running too, children looking for familiar faces.

I made it to the docks. There was a fishing vessel just leaving. It wasn't big at all, maybe big enough for three fisherman. I run up to it on the surface of the water, the splashes I made gone unnoticed in the cacophony that was Uzushio under attack, debris falling in the streets, and I sneaked in under the canvas that covered part of the boat. It smelled strongly of fish, but I hardly noticed it. The boat was gaining speed. I didn't think the fishermen noticed me sneak in on their boat, but I stayed silent and didn't move, hiding.

After some time, how long exactly was difficult to tell in the darkness and panicking, I heard a muffled sound of explosion. I knew it well, having mastered explosive tags. I peaked from under the canvas, and watched in terror as a huge plume of black smoke rose heavily over Uzushio. It was still standing. The boat sped up.

Eventually, I fell into a fitful half-sleep.

…

I woke up when the boat shored up. It was dark out, and I knew we haven't doubled back, which meant we must have been in the Land of Fire. The fishermen haven't noticed me yet, and I wanted it to stay that way. Mother hid my hair, so no one could tell I was an Uzumaki on sight. Just thinking about her made me tear up a little, but I refused to make a sound.

I sneaked out as quietly as I could, and when the fishermen were looking to get to land, I quietly broke the surface of water and dived. I could hold my breath for three minutes, and I swam as well as you could expect from someone whose life ambition was to maintain underwater seals. There was a feeling connected to that thought then that pushed to come to the forefront of my mind, but I pushed back and concentrated on survival. The beach where we landed was flat and there was no cover. Swimming parallel to shore, I found some rocks to hide in. The water was freezing.

The paranoia that had been Heather's second nature in the months before her death reasserted itself with a vengeance. I hid until I was sure the fishermen I hitched the ride with were gone. If Mum wanted to hide that I was an Uzumaki, I didn't even want anyone to know I escaped Uzushio. I refused to think about what might have been happening there.

I had never left the island before, but I had been diligent in my study of history and geography, sometimes even reading beyond the academy's syllabus, at home and in the clan library. I knew that Konohagakure was Uzushio's closest ally and that the Third Hokage was a student of a Senju, and that Senju were a cousin clan to Uzumaki. I wasn't safe out there (I've always been safe before. I was terrified and I was shaking, but I refused to make a sound and risk drawing attention to myself. I remembered how to be a survivor.) I needed to go to Konohagakure. Mum and Dad would be able to find me easily if I was with our allies.

I inspected the scroll that Dad has given me by the moonlight, and found that he had packed… an odd assortment of things. There was mostly food, then some throwing weapons, then some inks and brushes and an odd piece of clothing or bandage and one container of paste for burns, and it looked like at that point Dad had run out of time to pack. I didn't let myself cry again, and I unsealed some of the last night's dinner. I ate the onigiri in silence and contemplated how to get to Konoha.

I didn't know exactly where on the coast I was, but I was fairly sure it was the Land of Fire. I opted for going inland and finding a road.


	6. Destination

The ninja found me on the third day of my trek. I've been careful to avoid other travellers, I didn't want anyone questioning why was a child travelling alone. If Uzushio had been attacked, I had no way of knowing if the Land of Fire was peaceful or not.

The ninja dropped down from the trees when I had just decided to stop for rest. I was afraid to sleep through the night, so I had been taking naps whenever I felt like I was at the limit of my strength.

"State your name and purpose." There was only one of him, and I spotted the Konohagakure hitai-ate, but he didn't seem very sympathetic.

"My name is Himari and I'm going to Konohagakure." I didn't give my clan name; he didn't inspire a whole lot of trust in me, but maybe he could help me get to Konoha.

"Where are your parents, kid?" My lip started to wobble without my input. Where _were _my parents? They said that if all went well they would come and find me, but it had been four days, and there were yet to come for me. I tried not to cry and it must have showed on my face, because the shinobi finally showed some warm emotion. "Shit, it's fine, just don't cry now, ok? I'm going to Konoha too, I'll take you, and we'll talk about your parents then, ok?"

I nodded my head while rubbing the stray tear out of my eye. He seemed sincere enough when faced with a crying child, and it's not like I had a lot of options there. I found a road going inland, and I had been following it for the last two days, but how exactly to find Konohagakure was somewhat beyond me.

"Right, my name is Riku. Hop on kid."

"Ok, Riku-san." I climbed on his back and we were off.

* * *

We arrived in less than two days. That's at ninja speed. I didn't want to think how long it would've taken me to walk there, without knowing the way.

Riku put me down in front of a tall red gate. There was a wall running as far as the eye could see (which was not all that far in a forest) in both directions. I peered through the gate and I saw someone I had so not expected to see there.

"Auntie Keiko?!" the scream that came out of me was shrill and startled everyone in hearing range, before the shinobi guarding the gates could ask any questions. Keiko was standing with her back to me, chatting to someone, but I could have picked out the bright red hair and her posture apart from any crowd. She whipped around, and I realised my mistake. Her face was very much like Keiko's, and her eyes a similar shade of mauve, but she was too young to be my aunt. And she was wearing a Konohagakure hitai-ate. I shrank back into myself.

"Who are you, kid?" She strode right up to me confidently. "And how do you know my mother's name?" She didn't seem hostile, but not friendly either. I knew what she was saying was true; it's not difficult to tell an Uzumaki on sight.

That's why I slowly reached up to my scarf, telegraphing my movements; it's no use getting the ninja around me anymore twitchy than they already were. I pulled it off, and my hair tumbled down my shoulders. It was inevitably tangled and oily, I had just spent nearly a week on the run, but the shade of bright red was unmistakable.

The girl's eyes widened and she immediately looked up to Riku.

"What the hell, Riku? Where did you pick up a kid Uzumaki?!" She was definitely hostile now.

He raised his hands in a universal sign of surrender.

"She didn't tell me she was an Uzumaki, only that she was heading to Konoha. So I gave her a lift. Found her a day's away from the coast, all by herself." He explained quickly.

"Do you know what happened? Do you have any news from Uzushio?" I cut in, because I couldn't stand not knowing any longer. News in a ninja world ought to travel faster than a six year old on the run. "Who attacked us?"

Suddenly the atmosphere around me shifted. Before there had been suspicion and slight hostility in the air. Now the Uzumaki girl cringed, and the gate guards looked away.

"Uzushio… fell three days ago." I could see her lips moving after that, but it was as if someone cast a silencing spell, and all I could think of is that it was… happening… again…

I died to escape from the war, but it found me again. Heather literary gave up her life because I did not want to fight anymore. I had been happy, goddammit! I had a normal, happy family, and ambitions for the future that did not involve fighting, only protection, and a bunch of friends, and… and…

_Uzushio fell_

I realised I've fallen to my knees. I knew what that meant. The whole village had been built on a plan of a giant sealing array, designed as a protection. That's why Uzushio didn't have any walls; the very streets were creating a barrier, and every use of chakra inside the village charged it. The earthquake must have damaged the sealing array. And damaged seals tend to… they tend to…

I couldn't even bring myself to think it. Mum, Dad, Maiko, Akito, Auntie Keiko, everyone I had ever met… They didn't leave the sealing array in time. Now, they were all…

Dead.

I realised the Uzumaki girl (oh gods were we the only Uzumaki left? Was this stranger my last family in the world? I didn't even know her name) had kneeled down next to me and put her arms around me. I hadn't even realised I started crying. I latched onto her.

"Shh, shh…" She rocked me gently and I stopped shaking. When had I started shaking?

She pulled away and looked me in the eye. She brushed my hair away from my puffy face. There was strange determination in her eye.

"My name is Kushina, and your Auntie Keiko is… was," her voice caught but she bravely trudged on, "my mother." She had a really expressive face, and for a moment she seemed overwhelmed by her sorrow. I hugged her.

* * *

Kushina

The news about Uzushio arrived in Konoha two days ago. Every day since, I went out to the gates to see if the returning forces Konoha sent as reinforcements had found any refugees. Until this tiny Uzumaki girl arrived with Riku, there was no sign of anyone having escaped the purge that was the falling of Uzushio. She was too young for me to have known her before I relocated, but she had clearly known my mother. And apparently I looked like my mother…

"What's your name?" She looked up at me with clear despair in her bright green eyes.

"I'm Himari." She sounded really choked up. She was a child who apparently escaped a village under attack all by herself. It's been so long since I actually saw another Uzumaki, I couldn't possibly leave her to fend for herself in Konoha, when it's most likely that her parents were dead.

"Alright Himari-chan, come with me, alright?" When she nodded, I just picked her up.

We had just recently moved in together with Minato, and this was the second kid we picked up. Good thing we had a guest room. Kakashi was staying in there, but gods could that kid use some company his own age anyway.


	7. Settling

**Himari**

"I'm sorry Himari-chan, but it doesn't seem like anyone else has managed to escape."

I was sitting with Kushina in her living room, with a cup of tea. I had bathed and dressed in fresh clothes, some of it mine, some of it hers, and I finally felt the terror of the last days fall away from me. Instead, I felt cold fury come over me.

"Who attacked us?" I never saw, I run as soon as the barrier seals begun to strain. I didn't stick around for them to break and to see who broke them. I run like a rat from a sinking ship.

"Iwagakure and Kumogakure. They both lost significant forces in the purge." Kushina looked just as grim as I felt. To know that Uzushio took with it its attackers was a cold comfort.

"But…" There is one thing I didn't understand about the whole situation. "Why?" Uzushio didn't have a large population, or lie on any important trade routes. We exported fish, high quality ink and seals, and imported pretty much everything else. People of Uzushio had been content to stay on our little, out of the way island and practise the ancient Uzumaki art of sealing. We didn't plan on expansion, so it's not like we threatened anyone, let alone the great nations. The only ninja clan in Uzushio was the Uzumaki, with a few non-clan affiliated shinobi, and so the whole hidden village was really a glorified clan compound.

"We cannot be sure, but the way they amassed the attack, it seems that their goal was to completely wipe Uzushio off the map. We think it was because they are planning an offensive against Konoha, but wanted to make sure we could not draw on the Uzumaki sealing in battle."

So they were afraid of what seals could do on a battlefield?

"Kushina-nee, will you teach me?" The abrupt change of the topic seemed to throw her off a bit. "Sealing, I mean. I started my training already, and I'm doing well, but I still need instruction." Something in Kushina's eyes softens.

"Sure thing, Himari-chan! You'll be my little apprentice!"

* * *

Kushina-nee took me in. There were still no news about any other survivors from Uzushio except for me. Kushina-nee was Maiko's older sister, though she has left for Konoha to become Mito-sama's apprentice before Maiko-chan was born. Despite that, I could see similarities between them. They shared… had shared the same kind of explosive energy, which meant they never walked if they could run. Obviously, Kushina was older and more responsible, but it was not hard to see at all how she was related to Maiko.

Kushina-nee lived with her boyfriend, Minato Namikaze, who was also a shinobi of Konoha. He's not nearly as energetic as Kushina, but he was kind and hadn't object at all to me staying with them, even though they lived in a small two-bedroom apartment, and already had another orphan staying with them. Kakashi-kun was a year older than me, and already a chunin. He was Minato's apprentice, and he came to live with him after his father died. We shared a room, which at the beginning brought back Heather's memories of staying in shared dormitories during her time in Gryffindor. But Kakashi was hardly like Heather's classmates had been. He didn't gossip or complain about schoolwork, but we did stay up to talk sometimes.

"What are you going to do?" His grey eyes were barely visible in the dim moonlight, but I could tell he was staring at me intensely. It had nothing to do with the question in particular, Kakashi was just pretty intense in general.

"I used to want to be a seal master, so I could join Uzushio's barrier team." My eyes clouded for a second there, but I did not cry. This was not the first time I've lost my whole world.

Granted, Heather has chosen to move on, and I've been ripped from my home violently, but I suppose I had been foolish to think my life could be any calmer than Heather's. I had wanted to be able to live my life in peace, for once protecting instead of attacking, but this option was no longer available to me.

"But now I suppose I will become a ninja of Konohagakure." Konoha had been an ally of Uzushio, and even though they did not manage to save my home village, they were now at war with the perpetrators, Iwa and Kumo.

I couldn't do anything to keep my home safe anymore, but I could avenge it. They destroyed Uzushio because they were afraid of what seals could do on a battlefield, so I was going to learn what they tried to destroy. And then, when they would think that they have been successful, I would show them exactly why they should have been more thorough.

* * *

**Kakashi**

Himari was strange. When Kushina first brought her home, I thought it was going to be unbearable to share a room with a child, but she was surprisingly agreeable company. I hated to think in this way, but it seemed to me that the loss we both experienced in our lives made us see the world for what it was. She didn't shout and run around like the children at the academy used to. I could see she was dedicated to her studies, even though she wasn't a shinobi yet. She was quiet, and for that I was thankful.

Kushina-nee called her her apprentice, even though she would have to graduate the academy first before being entered into an apprenticeship, like I am apprenticed to Minato-sensei. But I supposed I could understand it; they were the only two Uzumaki around, and as I said, Himari was still in training; it made sense for Kushina to want to pass on Uzumaki techniques to an Uzumaki. And there weren't exactly enough left for her to be picky.

Sometimes I lay awake at night. I thought of my father and my duty to Konoha, and I was afraid to fall asleep. I would never admit it out loud, but nights like that I was glad I shared a room with Himari. When laying in silence and darkness got to be too much, I could just roll over. More often than not, she was also awake, and I knew she was haunted by similar thoughts to mine. We laid out our futons close to each other these days, so we could speak quietly and be heard. We never spoke about my father. She sometimes mentioned Uzushio, but usually she would catch herself then, and change the subject. We usually spoke about the things she learned at the academy; history and jutsu theory were common subjects.

Sometimes when I woke up our legs would be tangled or I would have my arm thrown over her stomach. I didn't mind; she didn't kick in her sleep and she was always warm to touch. I liked to think she was my friend.

* * *

**Himari**

The days felt too long to me. I wasn't given time to wallow in my grief. Every waking moment I looked out for news of any survivors of what was now known as the Uzushio purge, and with every day I had less hope any would emerge. I couldn't go out and search for my family; I didn't know the Land of Fire, and besides Konoha was now at war. I was helpless and I hated it.

Kushina enrolled me in the Konoha shinobi academy. I went willingly, because I needed to get better, to get effective. But I hated every minute I had to spend in the classroom in that stifling building in the middle of the forest. I was the only Uzumaki there; it felt so strange, and during some classes, like history, I could nearly fool myself I was back in Uzushio, but then I would look up, and none of my cousins were there, and I was violently reminded of the new reality.

The worst was the way to and back from the academy. Every time I went outside, I was reminded there was no smell of salt on the air, and my stomach would lurch. Then I would run to the academy, and no one would join me. Maiko would always make her way with me, but here there was no Maiko. There probably was no Maiko anywhere, hard as I tried not to believe it.

There were also no calligraphy lessons in Konoha. It felt so strange. Instead, they taught us basic jutsu, and very few chakra control exercises. And all physical conditioning classes were taught on land; apparently Konoha ninja didn't think swimming was a useful skill.

I hated it. It was just similar enough to remind me of Uzushio, but so different, I could never fool myself into believing I was home.

I pushed myself harder than ever before, my thoughts on those Uzumaki who might still be out there, struggling to reach an asylum.

...

A/N: Hi! What do you guys think of Kakashi's voice? Also, I'm afraid this story will now take a turn for the less fluffy; since y'know, war, (and also smol Kakashi) but worry not! I don't think I could write pure angst.

And what do you make of Himari's reaction? Does it seem realistic to you?  
More generally: would you guys like longer chapters?

Let me know!


	8. Chapter 8

We were sitting around the dinner table. Kushina's apartment was really quite modern, especially in comparison with my childhood home back in Uzushio. It was furnished with a high table, and we sat around it on high-backed chairs.

Today was a day off from the Academy, and Kushina, Minato and Kakashi were all home. It was pretty special for all of us to be there at once, since the war effort often took Kushina and Minato away from the village for days at a time.

To celebrate the small blessing, Kushina wanted to cook us a homemade meal. I helped her as best as I could, but I have never had to cook before (and Heather has hated it once upon a time.) But it was our best effort, even if I saw Minato pull a face at his first sip of the broth, before he bravely swallowed. We made ramen, of course. Kushina had said that no other dish was really worth making at home. Konoha was really big on street food vendors.

"Any news from the front?" Minato asked; Kushina had only returned last night.

"Not that I am at liberty to say." She replied grimly.

Kakashi looked up sharply at that (I think he was happy for any excuse to turn away from the food.) He opened his mouth as if to speak, but Minato sent him a sharp look, and he closed it again with a snap.

Kushina looked up from her own bowl at that.

"But I heard that our treaty with Kusa is straining." Her face pulled in a sour expression. "They blame us for not coming to their aid against Iwa."

Konoha, abandoning its allies? Unthinkable.

"But how can we, since we are facing war on two fronts, Suna has not mobilised yet as it should according to our treaty, and Kiri is just waiting for us to get stretched thin enough to jump in as well!" Minato clearly knew something of the front news himself. He was also clearly loyal to Konoha. I elected to stay silent.

Kushina reached across the table to cover his hand with her own and squeeze gently. The gesture reminded me of my parents and I looked away.

"And how is the academy going, Himari-chan?" Kushina must've noticed my discomfort.

"It's fine. I won't have a problem passing my classes." It was miserable and I wanted out of there as soon as possible.

"I don't expect to be deployed again for at least three days. What do you say we spend some time sealing?"

My mood brightened at that. Sealing with Kushina was my favourite thing in Konoha. It reminded me of home, but not in the bleak way like the academy, or like when I saw a happy family. It was also painful, but it was hopeful as well. Sealing was always something my family took pride in, and I hoped to take pride in it as well. I improved my skill continuously, and though it hurt my parents would never see my progress, every time I learned a new seal, or improved my execution of an old one, I felt closer to reaching a goal.

And also, when Kushina had down time, she would sometimes let me skip academy to study with her, if I could show her I was not behind in my classes, and I never was.

The rest of the dinner passed in a slightly better atmosphere. Kakashi told us about the progress with his training; he had recently signed a summoning contract, and was now learning to use it properly. He was clearly having a better time training on his own than I had in the Academy.

But the oppressive feeling of something ominous approaching loomed over our heads during the meal and after. It was unshakable. It was the feeling of war.

* * *

"Hey, Kakashi, why d'ya wear that mask every time you go outside?"

He just came in through the window, with Pakkun at his heels.

Pakkun was wearing an adorable little vest and I felt a smile stretching my lips. So that's what Kakashi had been hastily putting away every time I entered our room in the past week!

I was grinning now.

"Why did you bother to hide it from me?!" I got up from the kotatsu where I've been practicing my calligraphy and squatted in front of the pug. "Hello Pakkun!"

"Mari-chan!" He was still learning to speak the human way, so it came out with a bit of a bite.

I really couldn't stop myself from petting the adorable puppy. I reached out to pat him on the head: he initially growled at me, but once my hand actually connected he gave a sound of pleasure and launched himself into my lap. I laughed.

"Don't worry, don't worry! There is enough pats to go around!" I lifted him up so we could be face to face, and he licked me right across the nose. I laughed harder and put him down in my lap to settle down for some more snuggles.

Then I looked up at Kakashi, who in the meantime managed to put away most of his outside gear, and was now in the process of getting some food going in the adjacent kitchen. He'd taken off his mask, so I could see his stoic expression. How did someone as quiet and composed as him end up with such a tactile summon like Pakkun I had no idea.

"Is anyone else home?"

I shook my head.

"Kushina-nee is due back tonight, but I don't know about Minato." He nodded.

"I'm on the patrol rotation this week. Don't wait up for me."

I gave a nod of assent, but I gritted my teeth. It seemed like everyone but me had a hand in the war effort. Kushina and Minato were of course fully fledged soldiers, but even Kakashi, who was barely a year older than me got to go on patrol around the village to free up more experienced shinobi to fight on the front. Everyone could get a piece of Kumo and Iwa, except for me. I stewed inside, thinking about the injustice of it all. I was the one who had a revenge to enact on Iwa and Kumo. My home has been destroyed. And yet while everyone got to go out and fight the bastards, I was stuck in the stifling little Academy, full of little insolent brats who were not my cousins, learning their little jutsu and listening to their oppressive propaganda.

Pakkun licked my palm. I looked down on him. He was panting and his tongue was lolling. As I was watching he rolled over, showing his tummy, and wiggled in my lap.

"Belly scratches?"

He wiggled enthusiastically some more.

I indulged him.

Kakashi let out a long sigh from the kitchen.

"This is so undignified, Pakkun." Pakkun didn't seem to hear him.

Kakashi brought over two bowls of miso soup, and another bowl of food for Pakkun, and placed all three of them on the kotatsu, being careful not to spill anything on my calligraphy practice. We ate in companionable silence, broken only by the sounds of Pakkun trying to learn table manners.

* * *

"Duck!"

"Where?!" I ducked and shouted. It really pissed Kakashi off when I didn't seem to take sparring seriously.

"You brat!" He was a little winded, and since that shout came from the opposite side of the field, I knew he used an illusion to move his voice previously.

I rolled over my shoulder to avoid an attack that was sure to be coming, and sent a barrage of knives flying in Kakashi's general direction. Still crouching, I opened my scroll with a flourish.

I was just about to release the smoke bomb, so that I could transform into a duck, when Minato appeared right in front of me.

He caught the knife I've instinctively thrown at him before it could even nick him.

"Good reflexes, Himari-chan." He reached over and patted my head like I was a puppy. "Pack up, we're going home."

"But Minato-sensei, we were just getting started!" You could hear the whine in Kakashi's voice, even though he tried to cover it with his usual I-am-an-adult demeanor.

He was lying anyway. When I stood up to dust myself off, I could feel the fatigue set in, now that I wasn't in a combat situation any longer. My legs were shaking ever so slightly, and I was covered in dust from rolling around on the ground and ducking. We must've been at it for an hour at the least, since Kakashi picked me up for sparring straight from the academy, and now the sun was low in the sky.

Then the village alarm started and Minato tensed.

I felt fresh adrenaline course through my veins. My hands shook as I rolled up my scroll.

"Get a move on, kids!" Minato was agitated, but not surprised. Clearly he knew what the alarm was for, and if I knew him, it was also the reason he came to collect us from the training fields.

* * *

We made it home in good time. Kushina was there already, pacing and looking tense. When we burst through the door, she whipped around.

She looked awful. I've never seen her look quite so bad before. She had clearly come straight from the front. I've never realised this before, but in the past, she must have only come home after having cleaned up somewhere else. Now there was dirt on her face and white armour, and her hair, which was tightly bound, had twigs in it. There was dried blood on her hand, and I realised she was injured: a long shallow cut on her arm.

"Kushina! What are you doing here?!" Minato clearly also thought this was unusual.

"I had to make sure you were all alright." She seemed slightly crazed and more than a little out of it, as she said that.

She turned to me.

"Himari." I wasn't sure if her knees buckled, or if she decided to kneel down in front of me. "You're fine." She cradled my face in her hands. "I promise you, you're fine."

I didn't know what to say. My shaking had stopped. I realised I trusted her, despite how ridiculous her promise was. This was too much like the last time I had seen Uzushio, but Kushina assuring me that I would be fine put me at ease.

Maybe it was because she was the best sealmaster in the world and her iron will could literally contain the largest sentient chakra creature in the world. If she wanted to protect someone, they would stay alive, I knew.

"What happened?" Kakashi's voice broke through my reverie, and I looked away from Kushina's face.

"Kiri has joined the war. A new front has emerged." Minato was grim. His face seemed somehow overshadowed, and I could see the soldier in him clearly.

"It seems that they have joined as a new player, not as Kumo and Iwa's ally, though." Kushina straightened up, finally seeming to snap out of it. She looked around, as though she just realised where she was, and looked down at herself. Her head snapped up and she looked me straight in the eye, though it felt much more piercing, as though she was looking through me and inside my soul.

* * *

A/N: Sorry about the wait guys! Life's been busy, y'know, and I've the attention span of a goldfish. Don't worry though! I keep circling back to the Naruto fandom again and again, so I will finish this story! ...at some point. Also, I read something that really spoke to me the other day: about how if you worry too much about making your craft perfect, you will never practice enough to actually improve. So I decided to worry less about making this story perfect, since that's unlikely to succeed anyway and results in a year long wait between chapters... And instead I decided to just share what I've got with you and hopefully my next story will be better for it!

Oh, and also, I have a tumblr now, if you wanna chat or something. Honestly, I would love to hear from you!


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